We are sub 90 days until our big more to Australia. The train has left the station and we are going full speed ahead. This move is exciting, life-changing—and let’s be honest—a lot overwhelming. When you’re down to 90 days to an international move, having a clear, organized plan can make all the difference for your mental health and your families wellbeing.
Whether you’re relocating for work, adventure, or a fresh start, these next three months are all about preparation, organization, and managing the transition with as little stress as possible. So here is how we handle what is arguably the most stressful stretch of moving internationally.
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Start With Organized, Detailed Lists
You are likely working with a hard and fast approaching deadline for departure. Even some flexibility won’t really change the fact that when you have 90 days to an international move, your best tool is a well-structured system of lists to follow. This is not the time to rely on memory, get it on paper or print so you can visibly see and organize the workload.
Create separate categories such as:
- Documents & paperwork
- Home & belongings
- School & Pets
- Travel logistics
- Arrival planning
Use any tool that works for you, paper/pen, digital tool like Google Docs, Notion, or even a spreadsheet so you can update it in real time and access it anywhere.
Pro tip: Break large tasks into many smaller action steps. Instead of writing “Kids into New School,” this is my current list for the school transition:
- Unenroll in current school
- Request all current report cards, reports and references
- Put together good-bye parties and teacher thank you’s
- Get Yearbook for both kids before departure
- Complete enrollment paperwork for new school
- Email new coaches, teachers, counselors to get information and let them know your kids are transitioning mid-year. Ask to be connected to parents in your new school.
- Purchase new uniforms
This is just a fraction of my current list and I could break it down even further if needed. The more detailed your lists are, the less mental load you’ll carry! You will need every braincell available for the mental and emotional rollercoaster you are about to go on, so don’t rely on yourself to remember if you completed that school paperwork.
90–60 Days Out: Create a Backwards Timeline
At this stage, your priority is locking in the major pieces of your new life using all the information you have confirmed. My preference is to work backwards from the departure date, so you can set up a precise timeline for everything that needs to happen while thinking through the logistics of travel, belongings and necessary paperwork.
Key action items: (For Our Family)
- Secure visas and confirm passport validity – We updated our passports back in December, but double checking your official paperwork now gives you some time to make any necessary updates before it can hold up your departure. Passports need validity for 6 months past your travel date.
- Settle on Arrival Details – Whether it’s temp housing, rental cars or a signed lease and uber’s, the more details you can secure at this point, the easier it is to put the other pieces in place. Many utilities need a physical address to move things forward, so getting an arrival plan in place will help you start to put the pieces together.
- Confirm schooling – By this time, you should have chosen, applied and been accepted into your school of choice for the next destination. International schools often accept applications up to a year in advance but will have spaces open up as people leave through the year. If you have multiple children, the earlier you can apply the better. Make nice with the admissions department, they are your gatekeeper.
- Email important new adults to introduce your children and let them know what your goals are:
- prospective coaches, counselors or transition teams and have them assist you with getting in touch with other parents in your new school with children in similar age ranges.
- Ask as many questions as you can, the more you know, the better prepared you are.
- Email important new adults to introduce your children and let them know what your goals are:
- Research your destination (housing, neighborhoods, clubs to join, etc.) – This is the fun part, and it gets you excited about your new adventure. Use Get Your Guide or Trip Advisor to find and save restaurants to try, the big tourist attractions, a club you might want to join… You can start putting the pieces of your new life together.
- Notify your Network – if you haven’t already, tell your network of people when and where you are going. This is the time to call in help, favors or emotional support for your transition. You will probably need all three.
- Begin decluttering your home – You can’t start too soon on this task. This is the time to decide what you’ll do with your belongings. Separate into catagories:
- Ship
- Store (we don’t have this option on foreign to foreign moves)
- Sell or donate
Starting early prevents last-minute stress and expensive rushed decisions or what to do with extra belongings.
Pro Tip: When sorting belongings, understand the limitations of your next destination, such as different electrical outlets or space limitations. We have to be careful about bringing anything with pet hair to Australia as it can get rejected upon inspection. Check the State Department Travel Advisories Website to familiarize yourself with laws and restrictions.
60–30 Days Out: A Focused Unraveling (Preparing to Leave your Current Home)
With 90 days to an international move, this middle phase is often the busiest. There is a fine line between trying to get things off your list and pulling the plug too soon. So you choose to proceed is often your own comfort level and timelines for leaving your current housing situation.
Action items for leaving your current destination:
- Give notice to your landlord or prepare your home for sale
- Schedule movers or shipping services
- Cancel cell service
- Cancel or transfer utilities (internet, electricity, water)
- Forward your mail
- Notify banks/insurance and update your address
- Start packing non-essential items and labeling everything clearly.
For families, don’t forget:
- Put all dates for the remaining time on your calendar and make sure to schedule in time with loved ones. Not only is it helpful to have some fun breaks in the middle of a task heavy few months, but it will emotionally help you process the transition you are going through.
Mom Tip: Get a few fun surprises for your kids – whether they find it in their backpacks on the way to the airport or at the new destination, a smile is a smile in the middle of a tough emotional journey.
Final 30 Days: Prepare for Arrival
The last month is all about setting up your new life before you even land.
Action items for your new destination:
- Complete all medical appointments prior to leaving – giving you extra time in your new destination to set up new medical providers.
- Set up a bank account (if possible or necessary)
- Ship ahead any supplies you need for the first week in your new destination.
- Understand local transportation – download all apps needed to get around right away.
- Identify nearby grocery stores, schools, and essentials. Build yourself a personalized google map.
What I pack in my Personal Belongings (Carry-on):
- Important documents – passports, identification, some destination currency
- Medications
- Valuable Jewelry
- Basic clothing
- Comfort items for kids
Say Good-bye
Make time for the good-byes. You will want to Irish Good-bye yourself right out of town, but the important emotional component to this move is processing the grief of leaving. Don’t skip the tears and let your kids see you say a proper good-bye and appreciate the experience you have just had.
Managing Stress During the Transition
Let’s be real—having 90 days to an international move can feel like a countdown clock constantly ticking in the background. I am a fairly type A personality and this is when I find it very difficult to rest and control my anxious thoughts. This is a time of great transition, it’s an emotional minefield and it’s full of tasks that keep you non-stop coordinating with a zillion outside sources. So prepare your mind, build in some extra support and give yourself some grace during the whole process.
1. Focus on What You Can Control
Not everything will go perfectly, in fact, count on it not going according to your carefully planned itinerary. Flights may change, paperwork may take longer. Focus on completing your next task instead of worrying about the entire move.
2. Involve the Whole Family
Give everyone a role—even the kids. This helps them feel included and reduces emotional resistance to the move. I like to give them the task of finding a few fun activities for our first few weeks when we get to play tourists together. Let them google search their hearts away on fun cafe’s, museums, new parks or town highlights. It get’s everyone excited.
3. Build in Breaks
Schedule time to rest, say goodbye to favorite places, and enjoy your current home before you leave. I can’t emphasize this enough. Part of the process is the end and having those moments to say goodbye to your favorite coffee shop or front desk staff at the school can mean all the difference. It is a loss and there will be grief.
4. Expect Emotional Highs and Lows
Excitement, stress, sadness, and anticipation can all exist at once. That’s part of the process. It is the most bittersweet of events, sadness of leaving but the thrill of what is to come. Don’t miss out on feeling all of these emotions simultaneously, it is a gift to be this alive.
5. Books to Consider Reading
Before we’ve made new friends, we have a lot of time to be introspective and thoughtful about our transition, feelings of regret or loneliness might creep their way in. Here are a few books to help you, your teen or your smaller kids through that time:
Adults:
- Transitions by William Bridges – Check out my Expat Book Club post here!
- 25 Years in Provence – by Peter Mayle
- Mother Tongue – Christine Gilbert
Teens:
- Glory Abroad – by Cristi Slate
- Love & Gelato – Jenna Evans Welch
- Like A Fish In Water – Rich Kurtzman
Kids:
- New Is Fun, Too – Ariel Leshchinsky
- The House That Loved You – Nicole M. Gray
- Evelyn Del Rey is Moving Away – Meg Medina
Pro Tip: Visit a book store in your new destination. It’s a great ‘out and about’ activity for your first few weeks before you know a lot of people. This is my favorite foreign bookstore in Seoul! If you find yourself with a free afternoon, check it out!
Final Thoughts
When you have 90 days to an international move, preparation is your greatest ally. With organized lists, clear action steps, and a focus on both logistics and emotional well-being, your family can navigate this transition with confidence.
This isn’t just a move—it’s the start of a new chapter. And while it may feel overwhelming at times, it’s also full of possibility, growth, and unforgettable moments. I have always been nervous about change, but I have never regretted the chances we took on this journey. It has fulfilled me in ways that nothing else could have. When the opportunities presented themselves, we took them, and it has made all difference.
Thank you for coming along for this one.
exploring:
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